Posted on 01.31.2024
An Open Letter To Mark Zuckerberg, or When Bots Rule The World! - Soapbox Jr.
Dear Mr. Zuckerberg,
May I call you Mark, Zucky or Zuckster? I’ll just go with Mark for now.
Last week I wrote a Soapbox Jr. about the frustrations with Facebook in general, and the overwhelming number of scam bots we deal with on the CDB Facebook page, and many other artist and business pages, along with personal pages, and I echoed what many Facebook users have been thinking…
ENOUGH WITH THE BOTS!
Well, in turn, your scam bot collective coalition apparently said, “Hold my beer…” and turned up the infestation “up to 11” to quote the legendary Nigel Tufnel and it has made things even more frustrating to manage. It’s gotten so bad that even the bots don’t seem to know who is real and who is one of their imaginary brethren or sithren (although I’m not really sure that’s an actual word…).
I’m enclosing a couple of screenshots to help illustrate my point. First, a generous fella named “Frank” offered to give 5 people “6 grands” if someone would DM him “God did.” Well, “Milagros” commented on Frank’s post to tell him about the final winner of their Tiny RV Homes. The reply must have gotten the attention of Frank because he asked Milagros to inbox him. Scam bots trying to scam scam bots…
Mark, who would have ever thought that would be an actual sentence?
Oh, to be a bit, byte or kilobyte to see how that DM session played out… “Hi Frank dear… Oh you’re not interested in a Tiny RV…? Wait… Bob… is that you? How funny is that…? I gotta tell the guys in logistics, they’ll bust a gut over this! Tell Susan hey from me and Barb… That’s too funny!”
At least that’s how it went in my mind.
Furthermore, on a post wishing Ray Stevens happy birthday, a young woman allegedly named Mary asked a real fan (at least as far as we know) named Carl if she could ask him a question. I replied, “No, but can I interest you in the lucrative world of cryptocurrency…?” Sadly, she didn’t seem interested in Bitcoin. Maybe she’s just not into the whole Blockchain thing, or maybe she prefers XRP...
On the same Ray Stevens post, a real fan named Dean was deluged with requests from scantily clad young women who for some reason can’t figure out how to send a friend request. It was probably over a dozen different imaginary bimbos trying to snare ol’ Dean in their webs of deception.
On a post about Volunteer Jam VIII, “Patrick” asked if he could talk to someone, I said “No.” but he replied anyway. Then a fan named Charles – Must be a great guy – made this comment “These scam artists have no shame at all, do they?” Patrick reacted with a crying face emoji. So… I was ready to block Patrick until I saw that reaction. I was intrigued by his unintentional honesty…
Just kidding. I know it was just the scam bot algorithms auto-reacting with what they think is appropriate without paying attention to the actual comment.
The fact that Meta doesn’t seem to give a rat’s patootie about the quality of their service anymore speaks volumes.
If I went to order something on Amazon and I knew up front that I had a 50/50 shot that my order wouldn’t be delivered, or it would instead be delivered to the king of Nigeria, or that the money I paid was going to some fictional bubble-chested bimbo who says she is impressed with how I shop, who would then drain my bank account after the transaction and that Jeff Bezos said, “Sorry, there’s really nothing we can do about it,” I’m going to find a new place to buy my goods.
So… I have to ask the question, dear ol’ Mark… does Meta just not care that they are driving users away from their platforms? Instagram isn’t much better, but Mark if Meta doesn’t do something soon, your company is going to lose users, or you maybe you use us losers…
Back in the pre Meta-branded days I had heard it said that Facebook’s platform wasn’t the product they bought and sold, the Facebook users were the actual product by the way your company harvests the sensitive personal data it gets – willingly – from your users.
So, in a sense, your company does use us losers.
Your company has quite the stranglehold on social media platforms - Elon Musk’s X (The Platform Formerly Known as Prince - I mean Twitter) notwithstanding. And despite the tsunami-sized splash that China has made with TikTok, Facebook is still considered the gold standard. Well, maybe just tarnished brass nowadays…
Many have tried and failed to be the one to knock the big Meta bully off of its turf.
If Meta doesn’t realize how frustrating users are becoming with fake celebrity profiles, bogus cryptocurrency scams, scams selling love to lonely people, the tease of easy money from generous lottery winners, or Nigerian witch doctor prince or deceased country music singer whose kingdom and/or fortune can be recovered with your help, and a small bit of financial assistance for which they will be rewarded with one hundred times over what they put in.
So, Mr. Zuckerberg, even though it’s highly unlikely that you will ever see this, I’m going to say it anyway. If Meta doesn’t do something soon, someone is going to come up with an alternative social media platform or platforms that work better than yours and that manage to weed out a considerable number of scammers. When that finally happens, you and your shareholders will soon find your platforms in the company of the MySpaces of the world before you, in the Hebrew definition of the word “Meta.”
Dead.
What do you think?
Let’s all make the day count!
Pray for our troops, our police, the Peace of Jerusalem and our nation.
God Bless America!
- Charlie Daniels, Jr.
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Posted by Plowboy